Connect with us

Relationship

Painful Breakup: What’s Your Story? (Part 3)

Published

on

Helen is in the kitchen, trying to fix herself dinner when she hears the door slam shut. She  jumped in fright and switched off the gas. Wiping her hands clean on the back of her shorts, she tiptoed back to the room. Maybe he won’t barge in today, but that’s a chance she’s not willing to take.

Wincing as the pain shot through her upper arm like an arrow in Russian roulette, she pulled up a big sweatshirt with a hoodie from her bag; the goal was to hide the marks on her face—he doesn’t like to see the marks on her body.

Tears threatened to fall from her eyes as her mind screamed in pain trying to pull on the sweatshirt. What will happen if he heard her as she screamed? What if he hit her again like last night? Like a movie on screen, last night’s episode flashed through her mind; still fresh in her memory…how he beat her till she passed out just because Jason, her friend from college called her on her cellphone. God! Please save me!

If it’s love, why does it hurt?

Eyes darting to the door, she realised it was closed.  Quickly, she scrambled for it and left it open. He doesn’t like her closing the door either. Her heart hammered in her chest like those drums she use to play in church when she was little. Only now they were beating out of rhythm. He didn’t want her playing drums anymore. He said it makes her proud. Oh God! I’m going crazy, would you help me? 

“Helen!” She jerked in fright, “he’s calling me, God what do I do?” She hurriedly wiped her eyes clean as he appeared in the doorway with a lopsided grin on his face. In a nanosecond, a deep frown replaced the grin. “Are you crying?”

He hastened over, grabbing her face by the chin. pushing the hoodie off her head, he looked her over as his mood swayed to the one she knew like the back of her hand. “Am I not treating you well? Why are you sad?”She frantically tried to explain when the blow came out of nowhere and landed square under her nose.

He let her drop on the bed and continued haranguing her about how she should be grateful to him. These biting words were no longer new to her, she was immune.

All of a sudden, like light shines in a darkened room, the wheels of her mind in motion, she rose up from the bed. “This isn’t the end, I don’t deserve this. I can get out of this.”

She felt like a Phoenix, rising out of the ashes. Seeing the her chance, she landed a blow on his groin and dashed out of the house without looking back.

 Are you in a relationship swimming in physical abuse? Do you feel like there’s no hope for you? Maybe you think you won’t survive on your own if you leave him/her; there are even scenarios where the lady is the violent one.

Unless you are like that lady who went on social media telling the world that she loves it when her man beats her and feels it’s his way of showing his love for her, you need to come out of that relationship.

 It’s common for someone who is being abused to feel that they somehow deserve it. It’s important to know that you’re never to blame. 

How To Know Your Relationship Is Abusive

  1. They check on you all the time to see where you are, what you’re doing and who you’re with.
  2. They try to control where you go and who you see, and get angry if you don’t do what they say. 
  3. They accuse you of being unfaithful or of flirting.
  4. They isolate you from family and friends, often by behaving rudely to them.
  5. They put you down, either publicly or privately, by attacking your intelligence, looks, mental health or capabilities.
  6. They constantly compare you unfavourably to others.
  7. They blame you for all the problems in your relationship, and for their violent outbursts.
  8. They say things like, ‘No one else will want you.’
  9. They yell or sulk, and deliberately break things that you value.
  10. They threaten to use violence against you, your family, friends or a pet.
  11. They push, shove, hit or grab you, or make you have sex or do things you don’t want to do.
  12. They harm you, your pets or your family members. 

You might even make excuses for them, defending them and taking the blame. You’re scared of what they’ll do when you leave them. Please reach out to someone if you’re in this category. Remember there are people who still care.

 1,598 viewing this post

Over 150,000 Monthly Visits Become our Face Of The Week here
Share your story with us: Click Here
For Adverts and Publicity on this blog, Click Here
Advertisement
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Relationship

7 Signs That Show Your Girlfriend Is Cheating On You

Published

on

Are you in a relationship and you begin to notice some abrupt changes about your girlfriend? Are you afraid of heartbreak and you want to know if your girlfriend has been cheating on you? Then you have to familiar yourself with some signs that your girlfriend will begin to show if she has started cheating on you.

READ ALSO: 7 Dangerous Things You Should Avoid In Relationship

There is no one way to know a cheating lover, as a matter of fact, a girl might be cheating and she will not even show any sign until she is no longer interested in you. But there are some common signs that most partners begin to show when they have started cheating on their lovers.

READ ALSO: 7 Things Every Woman Wants In A Relationship

Cheating in relationship is a sign of self-regulation failure. When it happens ones, it is a mistake. When it happens twice, it is unfortunate. But when it happens thrice or more, it is a pattern indicating primitive, uncivilized inhuman behavior.” – Abhijit Naskar.

Cheating is not something that has to persist in a serious relationship
because
you don’t have any reason to stay with someone you are not loving again. Most people cheat because they are tired of the relationship, because they have found happiness somewhere else and some, because of their greediness. Thus, if you’re not satisfied with the care, love and attention you’re getting from your lover, you may possibly, end up cheating on him,

However, if a man wants to know when his girlfriend has began to cheat, he is advised to observe these 6 signs in them:

1. She changes her password frequently: this is one of the way to know a cheating girlfriend. She will always do her best to protect her privacy. Especially, someone who doesn’t value privacy before we now start seeing value in protecting all her WhatsApp messages, SMS, Facebook messengers and others. If she begins to do this, then she is up to something.

2. She begins to avoid going out with you: A girl that has interest in someone else will suddenly lose interest in following you to any event. She will reject your offer to take her out on a date because she doesn’t want the new guy she’s probably dating to notice that she’s dating you too.

3. She begins to smile to phone whenever she’s chatting: Suddenly, you will notice she has started smiling to phone, she’s probably reading the texts of her crush or the person she is now cheating with.

4. She begins to excuse herself whenever she wants to pick calls: Someone that has been picking calls in your presence before will abruptly, lose interest in picking calls in your presence. She does not want you to hear what the new guy is saying to her so she will do everything to excuse herself whenever the new guy call her mobile number.

5. She begins to ignore your chats: When you start noticing that your girl has began to ignore your chats that means she’s already losing interest in you. Most times, she reads your messages and refuses to reply all because the love is no more there. All because she has started loving someone else.

6. She begins to keep her phone away from you: suddenly, she will start protecting her phone. She wouldn’t allow you to notice or know what is going on. When you notice you may ask her ‘silly’ questions, that is why she wouldn’t even be careless with her phone at all. So that you wouldn’t find out what is going on.

7. She suddenly behaves strange: This is very common to every girl that is cheating. They will begin to act strange, get angry unnecessary and give you responses in harsh tones. When you begin to notice this, it means something is going on somewhere; probably, she has started cheating.

 611 viewing this post

Over 150,000 Monthly Visits Become our Face Of The Week here
Share your story with us: Click Here
For Adverts and Publicity on this blog, Click Here
Continue Reading

Relationship

Painful Breakup: What’s Your Story? (Part 2)

Published

on

It’s a lazy slide down to archived messages. He’s online! It’s 9pm and this should be the 20th time you’ve checked his profile picture; who’s counting anyway? He didn’t call today, but does he ever?

A deep sigh and 10 seconds later, you’re on twitter reading his tweets from top to bottom. Just then, a new tweet from him enters. Your heart thumps and starts racing…then you send a message.

You’re awake the next morning with a deep frown on your forehead. After morning prayers, the first thing you check on social media is twitter. He read and ignored your message. Then, you’re thinking—maybe his phone went off, maybe it’s network; a whole lot of maybes. Of course, you’ll defend him; because you love him.

You’re thinking maybe you shouldn’t jump to conclusions; he’ll reply. Then, you close your mind’s eye to all the many times he has ignored your messages before. You’re not sure if it’s just you or everyone goes through this in their relationships.

You always want to ask yourself where you’ve gone wrong. You’ve steeled yourself against calling him this time because he always says he’ll work on it and he never does. It’s the same old story!

Then one day, you summon courage and confront him. He says he doesn’t seem to have interest in the relationship anymore. His fear of hurting you made him keep it to himself for a long time. You wince as he drops this piece of news. To him, it’s a load off his chest but to you, it’s not just words, it’s like the day mama’s precious set of China slipped from your hands unto the tiled floor, breaking to smithereens. Only this time, it’s your heart on the floor in place of the China.

Then, you start blaming yourself; ‘maybe I was complaining too much’,  ‘maybe I pushed him away’, ‘or maybe I didn’t love him well enough’… All these daily plaque your mind and you wonder if you’ll ever get answers.

Most of us have seen instances of lopsided love. It happens:

1. If one person is doing all the emotional work in the relationship. Are you always the one who calls, texts, makes plans for an outing? Whose loving words are met with a strained silence or ignored? Is your partner unwilling to participate in making the relationship work?

2. If you find yourself giving and giving, listening, sacrificing time and your own priorities repeatedly while he or she never does the same for you, it’s a lopsided relationship.

3. If you find yourself making excuses for him or her, you may be having this fantasy that whenever you’re in a relationship, you have to stay with your partner in good times and in bad, and yet, he or she opts out time and again.

4. You’re not a priority in his or her life. If he or she always choose to give time and attention to everyone except you, then you’re definitely in a lopsided love relationship.

Ask yourself what you’re getting. What do you get out of giving and giving and getting little or nothing in return? Some people are dedicated martyrs in their relationships, how do you feel this will work for you long term if nothing were to change?

It’s a matter of what you can live with, what matters most to you and what you can let go.

This was another painful break up story. Have you experienced a similar situation? Or is your story entirely different? Please share in the comment section. Remember you’ve only gotten over it if you can talk about it!

 1,666 viewing this post

Over 150,000 Monthly Visits Become our Face Of The Week here
Share your story with us: Click Here
For Adverts and Publicity on this blog, Click Here
Continue Reading

Influencer's Corner

“You Are Not Fine. I Want To Date A Guy As Cute As Omarion” – Facebook Influencer Shares An Epic Story Of How He Met His Lover (See Funny Reactions)

Published

on

Many have actually wondered how Olumide Lawrence Odeyemi, a popular Facebook Influencer popularly known as GLOWVILLE got to meet his lover after a famous love story, remember the gist actually made waves in 2018 featuring on top blogs in Nigeria, Blogger proposes to girlfriend at same spot they met 5 years ago, it also got featured on Linda Ikeji’s blog then.

According to our source, he actually dropped a story of his life experience with ladies and how he eventually came to meet his lover, he shared it via his Facebook post earlier yesterday and it has actually attracted lots of funny reactions from his fans.

Read Full Gist:

Many of those who didn’t know me in 2016 have been asking how I met Dammy. Today, I decided to share our story one more time, hoping I won’t have to answer this question until 2024. 

Enjoy. 

A THROWBACK TO MY POOR ESTEEM.

I have always liked girls from a very young age. Call me ashawo, na you sabi. I enjoy their company and would always love to be seen with a beautiful chic. I had them aplenty right from my primary school days and never let them rest, my classmate Yemi Hayjaycity can testify to this. 

My fascination for fine girls grew so strong that I wrote my first love letter in Primary 5, but I never got to deliver it because my father found the letter in my pocket. The intended recipient of that letter never got to know about my feelings, neither did she know how I wished the ground would swallow me up when my father read the content of my well written love letter back to my hearing, laughing at every sentence that tickled him and asking me several rhetorical questions. I suffered for love sha , but that was just the beginning.

That embarrassing experience did not humble me, I continued chasing after girls. From my common entrance examination to my first Secondary School (Oshodi High School), I was lord among ‘oshomos’.

I got my confidence from believing that I was cute and any girl would love to be with me, coupled with the fact that I could talk my way into any situation and out of it. Well, it worked for me in more than 90% of the cases until I finished secondary school and went back home for IJMB preparations.

I got one babe’s contact through a friend, and we got talking. In those days, MTN XtraCool was the rave. I would sacrifice my food money during the day and sound sleep at night to speak with Tayo (Not her real name).

For over three months, we never saw physically, our friendship existed on phone; midnight calling. It was going as planned, she was falling, and I was grinning every night. The time came to ask her to be my girlfriend and she said we had to see each other before she would give an answer.

So, I got into my clothes the next day and marched straight to the address she sent to me. It was quite a distance from where I lived, but I climbed several mountains and swam through seas to get to my destination, all for love. 

I knocked on her gate and called her to come see me; her prince charming 

She came out to behold the glory of my face and I watched as a smile slowly disappeared from her face. It never returned!

She didn’t even let me enter into her compound. She rather wanted to talk outside, but I didn’t mind. I knew something was amiss, but I couldn’t place my hands on it. Was it my choice of outfit? Could it be the way I styled my hair? Was it about my cheap cologne? I had several questions in my head, but I managed to look unruffled.

Soon enough, it was time for me to leave, and she chose to walk me back to the nearest bus stop. So, I felt that was the right opportunity to ask what next.

“Now that you have seen me, what will your answer be?” I asked.

“I can’t date you” she replied curtly.

“But why?” I retorted, shocked.

“You are not fine. I want to date a guy as cute as Omarion” she responded with a smile for the first time in our conversation, without looking at me.

Silence was the case after then, till I got back home.

From that day, I started looking at the mirror consistently until I convinced myself that I was ugly.

Those words never left my head. I approached other girls after then, but it was with caution. I was scared someone else would say the same thing to me, and yes, a couple of them did. 

Some of them did it to make it look like they were joking. Others just gossiped about it, and I was opportune to hear. All these cemented the belief in me that I was not good looking, and thus did not deserve any beautiful girl no matter how much I tried. So, I stopped caring about my looks, being fashionable or anything fanciful.

Even when I ‘got lucky’ to be with some girls after then, I always adored them with the mindset that they did me a favour by agreeing to go out with me despite my ‘worworness’. But that was not enough to keep us together for long. We still broke up laslas.

Some of my female friends and colleagues also contributed subconsciously to compounding my damaged esteem. They would prefer to relate more with the cuter guys in our circle and just treat the rest of us (me) with friendly courtesy. This forced me to accept that fate. There was even a case of a guy whom I asked to help talk to a girl. The girl fell for him instead; it was that bad! 藍藍

This particular incidence got to me, so I started trying a few things my small brain could muster in order to look fine, but nothing happened. I even hung out with cute guys at some point, hoping it would rub off. That didn’t work. I later switched to befriending not so cute guys, so I don’t look like the odd one out, but they even had better luck with babes than me. Hard life! 

I graduated from OAU with that mentality and kept believing that I am ugly.

Much later, I became friends with another girl during the long wait for National Youth Service. I hoped she would be my girlfriend, but I soon realized I was not the only one on her case. I decided to give it my all, and get her. But despite everything, she opted for another guy that was not even so finer than me o  O dun mi gan!

I cried ehn…chai. If I didn’t know better, I would have said that was my first heartbreak. But I cried till I took ill. That was the lowest I had come since the Omarion incidence. I gave up on love totally, and finally opened my arms to fully embrace the fact that I did not deserve to be with any babe in this life. 藍

But God had other plans.

While nursing that heartbreak, my friend who had come to console me gave me a girl’s BBM pin, suggesting that she should be my rebound. Emi? Rebound? I never even manage to get one real GF, you dey tell me about rebound? Who me? Who form me? 藍

I sha agreed. After all, he that is down need fear no fall.

When I saw the girl’s picture, I saw that the girl was too beautiful for me. It was obvious that I would only be chasing shadows with her. But I needed to hold on to anything to get out of my mess, so I gave it a shot, just to have some new drama going on in my life.

We became friends on BBM. It took me a while to send her my picture, but I did after convincing myself that the worst that could happen was that she would delete me. To my surprise, she didn’t seem to be shocked by my worwority. 

I sent another and another, and it soon became a habit to send her pictures every other day. My confidence was gradually coming back. It felt surreal that someone actually didn’t tell me I’m ugly. Wow! See God! 

After 8 months of being BBM friends, we decided to see.

Memories of Tayo and Omarion kept haunting me for weeks. I was scared to my bones, but I eventually made the journey to her place.

I waited at the junction. She arrived. We saw. Nothing evil happened! God, na me be this??? I pinched myself a few times to wake up from the dream, turned out it was real.

She was more beautiful in person, but I still didn’t know what she had in mind about me. We went to her house, I met her folks and she made me settle down.

After staring in my face for a few minutes…

“You are cute, very cute” she whispered to me.

She was the first person to say that to me in years and it took me three days to believe. I kept looking at the mirror again, trying to see what she saw that Tayo didn’t see.

And yea, I found it!

I got my confidence back through the same medium I lost it; standing in front of a mirror.

I have Dammy to thank for that and I am deeply grateful. 珞

Really, no one is ugly; time and chance happens to us all.

Help people’s esteem, don’t destroy it.

See Funny Comments:

 4,485 viewing this post

Over 150,000 Monthly Visits Become our Face Of The Week here
Share your story with us: Click Here
For Adverts and Publicity on this blog, Click Here
Continue Reading
Advertisement

Advertisement

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

Trending

%d bloggers like this: